Dominant or Bossy?

That is the question.

I have a picture of myself at about three, which my ex, Beth, onee told me that I should, “put on your dominatrix page.”

I have said about myself that I was bossy at the age of three, and those of you who know me might recognize my current self buried in that personality, with her hands propped on her hips, looking up at the camera.

Honestly, to some extent, bossy and dominant are often the same thing, at least in most of the people I know.

The inability to make decisions is an astonishing thing to me.  I can make decisions quickly, and my judgement is usually pretty good, meaning that my tendency to decide quickly usually has pretty good re-enforcement.

While making a decision to do – or not to do – something is usually a fairly quick one for me, experience has also taught me to take more time before a final pronouncement.  I have friends whose advice I trust, so I take their counsel under advisement.

I also allow myself the luxury of changing my mind from that first decision I want to scurry towards.

Indecision is not a common companion for me.  It has only visited me occasionally, and in most cases, it had company, a blush of lust, a shadow of depression, a flash of anger.

So, I am both dominant and bossy.  I know how I like things, I know how I want them, I know what I expect.  I seem to not be too concerned with passing that information on.

So, am I dominant or am I bossy?  In this case, I believe I am both.









About MsConstanceExplains

Ms Constance has been actively involved in the BDSM/Leather community since the mid-1990’s. She is the Founder of the Louisville Munch as well as its hostess for ten years, from 1997 to 2007, and was christened as “Louisville’s First Lady” by her community. As a member of various BDSM/Leather organizations, she has been nominated for Pantheon Woman of the Year as well as regional awards, and has been nominated with her slave, drew, for Pantheon Couple of the Year. She serves as Special Events Director for the Great Lakes Leather Alliance. She produces the Bluegrass Leather Pride Contest, sending contestants to Great Lakes Leather Weekend, and was Presenters Committee Chair for Leather Leadership Conference 2010 Great Lakes/Ontario. She has produced and judged Leather events and contests, been instrumental in the organization and creation of various groups and clubs, advised and encouraged other communities and endeavors, and produced a performance by a BDSM comedian. Groups around the country use her writings in information and introductory packets, and she is an occasional columnist as well. She and slave drew hold the titles of Great Lakes Master and slave 2003.

Posted on July 9, 2012, in Dominance, Kink and BDSM, Submissives. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. I must admit, Ma’am, that when I saw your post title for today, I smiled to myself and said..”aren’t they really the same thing?”

    I know this is true for Master…He is often bossy…and always Dominant. I made the mistake the other day of being sassy…and saying he had put on his “Dom hat” that day…to which he responded that Dominance was not a hat one put on or off at will, but something that was intrinsically a part of who he was.

    all that, and bossy, too.



  2. I actually like “bossy” too. 🙂

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