The Official End of Birthday Festivities

Tonight was a lovely end to a pleasant birthday week.

I had dinner with some of my favorite people: Kenny, Charles and jacki, Josh, Gray. Steve and kim, Shane, Cerrin, Gabe, aisha and her Sir, and Mark and Christine.  We met at a local Chinese restaurant, one I like a lot.

We had a great time, with the conversation ranging from aisha’s lost box to Gabe’s acknowledgement to his doctor that he tests his own pain threshold, recreationally.  We had a lot of fun, and I’m sure the one other couple that was seated in the same large room near the end was either finding us entertaining or wishing the hell we would just GO, rather than stand around and talk and hug and say goodnight despite the fact that 75% of us or so were also at the Friday munch last night, not a far-flung family that they haven’t seen in months.

It’s funny how much we do that, how much time that I spend with the same people.

Louisville has an abundance of riches when it comes to gatherings and opportunities to socialize.  There is a munch here on the first Friday, the first Saturday and the fourth Sunday of every month, come rain, shine, Christmas Day or inconvenience.  There is also a group for those between the ages of 18 and 35 on the second Saturday, and a Special Interest Discussion group on the third Sunday.  There’s a MAsT meeting on the fourth Sunday.  There is a Coffee Meet and Greet every Wednesday.  There’s a kinky book discussion group.  There are Poly Meet and Greets.  There are probably two or three other things I am missing, even possibly something that I myself am responsible for.

On top of it, Louisville is only a couple of hours from a lot of other places that have regular gatherings or events.

Part of the reason we have so many things is because we support them.  As an organizer, there’s little that’s more discouraging than lack of interest or participation.  I’ve done a few things that got little or no response and that always makes you feel badly.  I had a birthday dinner with friends and there were 16 of us.  We would have had eight more but they couldn’t make it due to illness or other plans.

I do feel blessed to have a chosen family like this one.  Sometimes one of the good thing about being a marginalized community is you develop a firm understanding that if you do not stand together you shall certainly all hang separately.

It’s funny how they spoil me.  I have, literally, at least ten people that I could ask to get me something – a refill on a beverage, a napkin, whatever, without really thinking twice.  If I want THIS chair at THAT spot, people scurry to make it happen.

I was awful at the party I went to at Charles and jacki’s back on July 4th.  I came in and there was a comfortably chair, a rocker with cushions which was, right then, being vacated by someone else saying, Oh, Ms Constance, we were saving this for you.  I sat there and people brought me food and drink.  I finally went outside for a bit and when I came back in there was a woman I had never seen before, obviously new to the community, who was sitting in the chair.

I said, “I’m sorry, you’re going to need to move, that’s my chair.”  How bad is that?

What is worse, of course, is that without protest or even a sense of surprise, she hopped up and I sat down and someone else brought me more food and drink.

So happy birthday to me, there are worse things.

About MsConstanceExplains

Ms Constance has been actively involved in the BDSM/Leather community since the mid-1990’s. She is the Founder of the Louisville Munch as well as its hostess for ten years, from 1997 to 2007, and was christened as “Louisville’s First Lady” by her community. As a member of various BDSM/Leather organizations, she has been nominated for Pantheon Woman of the Year as well as regional awards, and has been nominated with her slave, drew, for Pantheon Couple of the Year. She serves as Special Events Director for the Great Lakes Leather Alliance. She produces the Bluegrass Leather Pride Contest, sending contestants to Great Lakes Leather Weekend, and was Presenters Committee Chair for Leather Leadership Conference 2010 Great Lakes/Ontario. She has produced and judged Leather events and contests, been instrumental in the organization and creation of various groups and clubs, advised and encouraged other communities and endeavors, and produced a performance by a BDSM comedian. Groups around the country use her writings in information and introductory packets, and she is an occasional columnist as well. She and slave drew hold the titles of Great Lakes Master and slave 2003.

Posted on September 8, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. It was a great time, wasn’t it?

    Ok, so I blushed a little bit on account of the reactions to my announcement that i’d “lost my box.” {it was my to-go-box, people! Get your minds out of the gutter!} But i think the idea of getting you a t-shirt that says, “Testing OTHER people’s threshold of pain, recreationally” was a stroke of genius. Maybe for next year’s birthday…


  2. I expect I would hop up and vacate that chair for you too! Happy Birthday btw!

  3. Happy Happy Birthday – here’s to the next fifty!! Having that support system is AMAZING! Having moved recently, I feel that loss – now working to regain a local support group myself. Glad you had an awesome party!

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